Monday, November 7, 2011

I'm Not an Animal!

I recently discovered this about myself - I’m really hung up on how people smell. I was watching a makeup commercial with Drew Barrymore on it, and all I could think was “I wonder if she’s ever farted in public? Does it stink when she does? In fact, I wonder if she’s ever queefed and owned up to it?” Weird, I know, but this is a large part of why I find myself unable to be attracted for too very long to any movie star or media icon. I think about the reality of the person. The odor of the person. I know I’m not supposed to, that they’re supposed to be these projections of beauty, but I can’t help it. “Hmmm…Robert Downey Junior talks about spending 12+ hours a day on set. I wonder if he walks around smelling like balls and ass?”
Angelina Jolie and NPH are the exceptions. I’m pretty sure she smells like angels and stardust. And I'd bet Angelina smells pretty good too.

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