So, I make all this delicious food, these tasty dishes,
these culinary masterpieces, and you wanna know what my children scream are
"DELICIOUS!" and beg for more when I add them to their lunch plate
and throw a fucking shit-fit when there aren't any? Crackers. Plain boring old
bland motherfucking saltines. Fucking. Hell. On the plus side, I see a
drastically reduced grocery bill in the near future...
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