Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Elephant in the Room or, A Brimful of Asha

I just had the police called on me. For being out in public. With my children.

We were out, trying to get some lunch, and I had had the kids sit on a flower box on the sidewalk while I called the bank regarding a pin issue. 

Some old lady drove up next to us, rolled down her passenger window, and got all up in my business. She asked me if the children were okay, then asked if they were in danger, the whole time giving me the stink-eye.

"I'm their father. They are in a safe location, and are being supervised. What possible danger could they be in?!"
"I'm calling the police."
"To report yourself for getting all up in my business and being a public nuisance?"

I'm not sure if she called them or flagged them down, but a few minutes later, the police showed up. They drove through the parking lot, took one look at me, gave a wave and a nod, and kept going.

Between this, the Timmy incident, and the too-long grass, is it any wonder I never want to leave my motherfucking goddamn house?! GAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!

Honestly, I realize this issue is small, comparatively, opposed to, say, the sexist oppression women face everywhere, but it is awesome to me that everyone I know and love understands that narrow-minded shit like this is not okay. I don't understand what her motivation was. 

I was told once at a park by a mom that, as a man, I didn't have the ability to nurture that it takes to effectively and lovingly raise children. I get statements like this every once in awhile, and generally I have a decent retort, because, um, ME. Often, though, I get "Daddy's day out, huh?" "Is it Dad's day with the kids?" "Got yourself a day off work, huh?" Mother. Fucker. This IS my job.

It's funny, in a sad way. The snap-judgement extremes people go to. I receive from total strangers either total big-scary-man avoidance, or in-your-face counsel, condemnation, and reprimand, or just the assumption that being a dad is a part-time gig. I can't wrap my head around that mentality.

I like the middle-grounders, the opinionated, outspoken neutral non-neutrals. Those that don't give a fuck about the gender of myself or my children, or the clothes we wear, or how we spend our day. Those that know we are just parents and children, trying to enjoy life as much as possible, and trying very hard not to hate with the burning fire of a thousand suns everyone else that feels the need to ejaculate their anecdotal blurbs of parenting wisdom all over us.

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