Had
some family drop in at D'Agovillagio for a visit. With them came a moment of
self-realization: I fucking HATE it when someone comes into my house and
exclaims, in surprise, every time, "Wow! Your house looks so CLEAN
today!" My guess is they're trying to be nice, but their tone and
inflection make me feel like every time they've visited before, our house was a
fucking sty.
Two
things - 1: I clean my house regularly, and - of course - more so when people
come to visit, but sometimes, well - I don't fucking feel like cleaning. Or I’m
playing with my kids. Sometimes I get distracted from the chores by LIFE. Shit
stacks up. Deal with it.
2:
I have THREE CHILDREN. It takes them about half a second to DESTROY a full day
of cleaning, so fuck off - if my house has been dirty when you were here
before, it seriously could have happened 3 seconds before you walked through
the door. Have you SEEN Gaius eat a muffin?
My
family is happy and healthy. The mess isn't gross, it's just...messy. If the
unkempt nature of my domicile makes you uncomfortable, there are options. I
could get you a blindfold. You could pick up a broom and go to work. You could
help yourself to a nice tall glass of shut the fuck up. Whatever works. Just
don't come up in my house and insult me, or I'll be forced to do the same to
you.
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